Don't worry. This is just a reenactment of a deadly bicycle accident.
I know it was after 1999 (I know, not that long ago) because I was wearing my favorite shirt: "Class of 1999, Sunnydale High School" with small pictures of Buffy, Xander, Willow, Cordelia, and Oz. I treasured this shirt. I treasured it so much that I would take if off if I spilled the slightest thing on it for fear of stains...you know, even though it was black. Well anyway. I was riding my bike on my street. Nothing out of the norm. My street was always filled with people my age hanging out. So I was riding my bike with my friend Joey one day. The Hammond family car passed by us. Now, the Hammond family was probably the strangest family ever. Well, no, actually that would be Megan's family who lived a few houses down from the Hammonds, but whatever. They were weird and the kids were annoying and smelly. Still on my bike, I watched as the Hammond vehicle passed me. For some reason, I found it necessary to watch the car pull into their driveway. You know, after they had already gone behind me. This was a bad mistake. My eyes were not on the road. Consequently, I crash against a mailbox. The crash wasn't the bad part. The bad part was how I slid against the metal hook protruding from the box. My side was cut from my back to my stomach. I bled. Hard.
The accident wasn't the really bad part. The bad part was that the mailbox also cut my shirt from the front to back. MY FAVORITE SHIRT. I was traumatized. Hence, why I can still vividly remember this moment.
Fucking Hammond family.
That's my story. I'm sure all of you readers have a story to share with us. Please, comment and share! These events interest me!
Oh, also, I CAN'T FIND A PICTURE OF THE T-SHIRT! Noooo!! It's lost forever!! It only exists in my memory!!!
EDIT: I FOUND A PICTURE. That took way too much time, but it was worth it. Too bad it is tiny, but you get the idea:
I know it was after 1999 (I know, not that long ago) because I was wearing my favorite shirt: "Class of 1999, Sunnydale High School" with small pictures of Buffy, Xander, Willow, Cordelia, and Oz. I treasured this shirt. I treasured it so much that I would take if off if I spilled the slightest thing on it for fear of stains...you know, even though it was black. Well anyway. I was riding my bike on my street. Nothing out of the norm. My street was always filled with people my age hanging out. So I was riding my bike with my friend Joey one day. The Hammond family car passed by us. Now, the Hammond family was probably the strangest family ever. Well, no, actually that would be Megan's family who lived a few houses down from the Hammonds, but whatever. They were weird and the kids were annoying and smelly. Still on my bike, I watched as the Hammond vehicle passed me. For some reason, I found it necessary to watch the car pull into their driveway. You know, after they had already gone behind me. This was a bad mistake. My eyes were not on the road. Consequently, I crash against a mailbox. The crash wasn't the bad part. The bad part was how I slid against the metal hook protruding from the box. My side was cut from my back to my stomach. I bled. Hard.
The accident wasn't the really bad part. The bad part was that the mailbox also cut my shirt from the front to back. MY FAVORITE SHIRT. I was traumatized. Hence, why I can still vividly remember this moment.
Fucking Hammond family.
That's my story. I'm sure all of you readers have a story to share with us. Please, comment and share! These events interest me!
Oh, also, I CAN'T FIND A PICTURE OF THE T-SHIRT! Noooo!! It's lost forever!! It only exists in my memory!!!
EDIT: I FOUND A PICTURE. That took way too much time, but it was worth it. Too bad it is tiny, but you get the idea:
9 comments:
OMG KYLE! its so weird this one time i was riding my bike down the street and this weird family drove past me and i watched them drive into their driveway and wasnt paying attention to where i was going and crashed into a mailbox and the big metal hook scratched my back and i bled like, whoa! but thats not the really bad part the hook also tore mah FAVE BUFFY SHIRT. it was horrific. so thats my other bike story, i have so many, weird!
here's my other bike story. one time i was riding up my driveway and i had a rootbeer barrell in my mouth. for some unknown reason, i took a tumble off the bike. I think my shoe somehow got tangled up, you know what i'm saying. there were pieces of rootbeer barrell on the ground and for a minute i thought i had knocked my teeth out or bitten part of my tongue off. scary!
My bike story is the one I think I've told at least some of you before -- It was 1992, I was in first grade, and my shoelace got caught up in my bike and caused me to fall. Being the incredibly smart first-grader that I was, it didn't occur to me to take off my shoe and walk the bike home to untangle the lace from the spokes... Instead, I dragged the entire bike home while still attached to my foot, crying the whole way.
I wasn't that young. I was 16.
Shit, that was embarassing.
I want to see a picture of said shirt. I'm sure that there is still one picture of it SOMEWHERE.
I can't explain to you my bike story without first telling you that I had an unhealthy obsession/complex with Peter Pan.
When I was five and six years old I would watch the Mary Martin version of Peter Pan everyday. I would close the door to my basement and fly around off of tables. I spent endless hours crowing. I mean I thought I was The Pan.
So it was any other normal day and I was riding my bike around my house crowing and fighting captin hook when my tire got caught on a garden hose on the tree lawn. My bike went down and so did I. My leg got caught somehow between the chain and the bike tire. It was very painful.
I cried for my mom but because of my Pan obsession she just assumed I was crowing and contunied to cook dinner.
I spent TWENTY GODDAMNED MINIUTES lying next to the street while cars drove by stuck in my bike.
It took two old laddies who were power walking down the street to stop and get my mom.
They naturaly assumed she was a drunk and a poor mother.
I still love peter pan though.
And on the plus side of your story- Now I know what to get you for your birthday!
I. Love. Theresa's. Story.
Mary Martin's Peter Pan? Absolutely ridic. But it makes for a good story. Unfortunately none of my stories are really any good. They pretty much go like "One day Dustin was pretending he was a Ninja Turtle or one of the Biker Mice From Mars. Dustin built a ramp out of plywood and cinder blocks. Every time Dustin tried to ramp it he failed to hit it at nearly enough speed to do anything except nosedive everytime at the top of the ramp." This happened a lot. I wish I'd had cable as a kid so I could've watched Kids In The Hall every time I injured myself...There is also a story involving a clubhouse and nunchuku, but that's for another time.
oh my being such the accident prone child that i was i have sooo many bike stories below are just a few that i could think off the top of my head, enjoy!:
here's my other bike story. one time i was riding up my driveway and i had a rootbeer barrell in my mouth. for some unknown reason, i took a tumble off the bike. I think my shoe somehow got tangled up, you know what i'm saying. there were pieces of rootbeer barrell on the ground and for a minute i thought i had knocked my teeth out or bitten part of my tongue off. scary!
My bike story is the one I think I've told at least some of you before -- It was 1992, I was in first grade, and my shoelace got caught up in my bike and caused me to fall. Being the incredibly smart first-grader that I was, it didn't occur to me to take off my shoe and walk the bike home to untangle the lace from the spokes... Instead, I dragged the entire bike home while still attached to my foot, crying the whole way.
I can't explain to you my bike story without first telling you that I had an unhealthy obsession/complex with Peter Pan.
When I was five and six years old I would watch the Mary Martin version of Peter Pan everyday. I would close the door to my basement and fly around off of tables. I spent endless hours crowing. I mean I thought I was The Pan.
So it was any other normal day and I was riding my bike around my house crowing and fighting captin hook when my tire got caught on a garden hose on the tree lawn. My bike went down and so did I. My leg got caught somehow between the chain and the bike tire. It was very painful.
I cried for my mom but because of my Pan obsession she just assumed I was crowing and contunied to cook dinner.
I spent TWENTY GODDAMNED MINIUTES lying next to the street while cars drove by stuck in my bike.
It took two old laddies who were power walking down the street to stop and get my mom.
They naturaly assumed she was a drunk and a poor mother.
I still love peter pan though.
They pretty much go like "One day Dustin was pretending he was a Ninja Turtle or one of the Biker Mice From Mars. Dustin built a ramp out of plywood and cinder blocks. Every time Dustin tried to ramp it he failed to hit it at nearly enough speed to do anything except nosedive everytime at the top of the ramp." This happened a lot. I wish I'd had cable as a kid so I could've watched Kids In The Hall every time I injured myself...There is also a story involving a clubhouse and nunchuku, but that's for another time.
OMG! Marie, you have had so many accidents!! I'm surprised you're not dead!!
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